
Trump’s tariffs torch big tech
Silicon Valley in melt down
Big Tech just got a bloody nose thanks to Donald [hamburger-eating surrender monkey] Trump’s latest trade war tantrum.

Vole’s top trio roasted by its own bot
AI cracks jokes as Microsoft marks half a century
The Software King of the World Microsoft celebrated its 50th birthday by wheeling out all three of its CEOs for a bit of self-inflicted ridicule—with help from its AI lapdog, Copilot.

Vole punts pricey plastic brick for cloudy PCs
Dumb and dumber
The Software King of the World has officially released its Windows 365 Link—a dinky $349 (£349) black box that connects users to Windows Cloud PCs running in Azure.

Vole jams brakes on global server sprawl
Microsoft trims data centre ambitions
The Software King of the World, Microsoft, is quietly pulling back on data centre projects from Chicago to Jakarta as jitters grow over AI demand forecasts and the cost of building its cloudy empire.

Bill Gates drops OG Microsoft code to mark 50 years
Software King of the World goes full retro, slings Altair BASIC source for the nostalgia crowd
The Software King of the World, Sir William Gates III, is marking Microsoft’s 50th birthday by releasing the digital equivalent of a baby photo onto the internet—a 150-page slab of Intel 8080 assembly code from Altair BASIC. This code launched the empire.

Vole gives BSOD a makeover
Paint it black
The Software King of the World, Microsoft, has plans to make the infamous Blue Screen of Death crash message in Windows 11 less blue and a bit more bleak.

China masks up in Taiwan chip heist scandal.
Beijing’s talent-thieving ops exposed by Taiwanese spooks
China has been playing dress-up in Taiwan’s tech scene, creating fake firms to lure semiconductor experts into helping bolster Beijing’s chip ambitions—without anyone knowing they were working for the mainland.

Microsoft turns 50
Early insiders reflect on the messy genius behind Vole
The Software King of the World has officially hit the big five-oh, and the Seattle Times kicked off its retrospective with a perfect line: “Microsoft built things. It broke things.”

Microsoft moved by DeepSeek’s AI blitz
Getting more from it than ChatGPT
The Software King of the World, Microsoft, has been playing with DeepSeek’s R1, and it appears to be impressed.

Nvidia’s Huang backpedals on quantum computing doom
Hosts awkward apology tour
Nvidia’s leather-jacketed hype merchant, Jensen Huang, has flip-flopped on the future of Quantum computing after the cocaine-fueled nose-jobs of Wall Street threw their collective toys out of the pram.