Wants a few Bengal tigers 

The bloke who once described his management of staff as being a bit like a zoo keeper, Foxconn's Terry Gou wants to expand his operations into India

The ego has landed

Apple messiah Steve Job was worried that that in the cult worship that would follow his death, Apple would be moved to name its "spaceship" campus building after him

Jobs Mob can't get broadcasters

Fruity cargo cult Apple's attempt to enter the set-top market is fast going the way of Intel's failed attempt.

Hotcake makers unavailable for comment

Market research firm Gartner has estimated 7.3 million Chromebooks would be sold this year, thanks mostly to the education industry realising that kids need keyboards rather than touchscreen tablets.

Sales forcasts slashed

Analysts have finally started to wake up to the fact that Apple is probably attempting to flog a lemon with its iWatch.

New iMac with Retina 5K display

Apple has unveiled its newest 15-inch MacBook Pro which includes both AMD Radeon R9 M370X GPU,  the Force Touch technology.  It has also been showing off a new US $1,999 priced iMac with Retina 5K display.

Hail hydra 

When anyone says that Apple has run out of ideas, someone in the Tame Apple Press starts to talk about Jobs' Mob's television plans and how they are going to "game change" the entertainment business.

But Apple thinks it might be Zeusless

Intel is just about to release a new version of Thunderbolt, just as its most major customer – Apple, has dropped the technology from its 12-inch MacBook.

Yields will be fine

The dark satanic rumour mill has been churning out yarns claiming that Jobs' Mob's iWatch was suffering from poor yield rates at the Quanta plant.

Flickering reality distortion field

The Tame Apple Press is starting to realise that all those years about the iPad being game changing were basically a lie peddling another hula hoop style fad.